T-minus 364 days

Today, I turned 39.

I feel 27. I look 39. If I'm lucky.

What has happened in 39 years? I started life in Toledo. I spent a few years in Tennessee. My school years were spent in Appalachia of Eastern KY. I then moved to central KY where I was converted, later met my wife, was married and saw my first two children born. 1995 found us moving to N.KY where my third son was born in 2000.

Life has been good. Life has been busy. But as Moses inferred to God, 'as much as You have given I want more.'

Throughout the next 39 years, if the Lord allows the years to stretch that far in the future, I hope to...

*Attend my 56th wedding anniversary.

*See my children and their children effectively, imaginatively serving Jesus through the local church.

*Plant a church.

*See FBC become a reproducing church.

*Have the hottest 80 year old wife in KY.

*See Jesus come back.

Fear

Last week my Alyson graduated from 6th grade. In their program they have to recite a verse that has special meeting to them. She quoted I John on 'perfect love casting out fear...'

It's that verse and life in general that makes me ask what things am I afraid to attempt?

I periodically make myself think of this question. It especially seems relevant as I enter my last year of being 30 something.

What is it spiritually that I don't want to leave undone? What do I want to accomplish as a leader? How about as a husband and a father?

This quote from Teddy Roosevelt has given me much to think upon in that vein...

It's not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or when the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spends himself in a worth cause; who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who at the worst if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat.

Missions to slums

The book The New Friars is one of those books that get in your head.

Let me lay out the premise. People (college kids, families with small children, etc) want to live the Gospel out and not just speak it out. Which by the way was the combo the Bible teaches. To just speak is usually unbalanced fundamentalism. To just 'live it' usually degenerates into a social Gospel. To use Tim Keller's unoriginal phrase, "it's about word and deed."

Back to the point, these New Friars are going into inner city slums and even international garbage cities, to live as one of the communities. They live in the same squalor, at the same financial level, truly as one of them (kind of sounds what Jesus did. 'He who was rich became poor for our sakes.'

The challenge I find isn't to go live in a slum, under a bridge or garbage city. Rather it is to truly live so I can genuinely connect to people. Whether the place God places me is suburb, slum or city.

Here's the book. You can get it at the local library.

Burn out

Two years ago there are two words I would have never thought I would take seriously and that is burn out.

I think God has changed my mind. The hard way.

The last 14 mos has either felt like turmoil, plowing through turmoil or trying to avoid future turmoil. Confessedly, the term may be over dramatic but it has a post traumatic stress vibe to it.

Here's the problem with burn out when it comes to the Lord's work and spiritual exhaustion.
1. Always almost angry.
2. Bored. When you try to avoid turmoil you avoid opportunity as well.
3. The neighbor's hyper green grass. You look around and every one's grass looks greener. Then you always look at your own backyard as being burned up.
4. Feeling like a victim. Trapped is a word I recently used.

Nevertheless, I feel like maybe I am inching my way out. Slowly.

Here are some things helping.
1. There's a point for going through burnout. Among other things it breeds sympathy.
2. How important the family is. A supportive but honest wife. Having kids that can simply be enjoyed.
3. Understanding the 'trapped' feeling can be a stage of growth, or the results of fixating on the negative and not giving the positive at least equal time.
4. Enjoy the now.
5. Men better than me have wrestled with burn out effects: Spurgeon is but one example.

I still hate it. I hope it is evaporating. I hope that I get the God intended education for it.

Spiderman 3

It was inevitable. I chunked down the $9.25 to see S3 @ the Levee last night.

First, the special effects were fantastic. The Sandman? Very cool.

Second, the storyline was...there was no storyline. The movie was made for fight scenes and effects.

Third, how could MJ cry that much and not dehydrate? I think Kirsten Dunst (?) is the best crier in Hollywood. You can just feel her ache.

Worth noting: The sin/redemptive angle was more obvious than Toby McGuire's lack of true acting.

(A)The black suit just screams the seduction or sin. You can see the lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh and the pride of life written all over it, as the Apostle John might notice.

(B)The scene where Spidey is freed from the black suit in the church and near the Cross. Self explanatory.

(C)The theme of sacrifice and forgiveness is clearly played out.

Final Opinion...
Rumor has it that S3the most expensive movie ever produced. The $$$ was evidently spent on the visuals which makes for some excellent eye candy. The spiritual angle is worth noting. All in all not a bad way to spend a couple of hours relaxing and zoning out.

It was a good point...

I am not a fan of my own preaching. Preaching is very personal, very vulnerable. I would liken it to being naked in public. Now, there's a mental image you have to live with!

Nevertheless, the Holy Spirit did give me a powerful illustration this past Sunday. There was a time in our church's past that we should have gone into a neighboring town to start a Sunday School rather than busing the kids 30 miles round trip to attend ours. But we didn't. Not only did the opportunity to expand ministry die, but so did the van route.

After the sermon one of our church leaders pointed out that becoming indigenous in the local towns should be approached as a less prideful option, because ministry isn't about everything being done on property. Ministry is about the Cross, the Kingdom and the church. These things aren't contradictory, they work in tandem.

What if we asked the question: What do we do to present the Cross, seeing the Kingdom expand and the local church blessed?

Beyond that we could subscribe to the quote by Reagan, "It's amazing what you can accomplish if you don't care who gets the credit."

What in the name of the Cross, Kingdom and church should we be doing and could be doing if we didn't care who got the credit and feared God more than man?